Standup Comedy "Your Host and MC"

Don Friesen Interview The Only 2 Time Winner of SF Comedy Competition! Show #76

August 01, 2021 Scott Edwards Season 2 Episode 76
Standup Comedy "Your Host and MC"
Don Friesen Interview The Only 2 Time Winner of SF Comedy Competition! Show #76
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Show Notes Transcript

This is a fun interview with comic Don Friesen from LA, he got his start with improv at USC and ended up as one of the best road comics and a Showtime TV Special in 2012. Hear how he started and grew into one of the Best. He has done TV, years of standup comedy, and many one-man concerts. PLUS, a short set of his standup follows, so lots of Laughs here.

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Announcer:

This is another episode of stand up comedy, your host and emcee, celebrating 40 plus years on the fringe of show business, stories, interviews and comedy sets from the famous and not so famous. Here's your host and emcee Scott and words.

Scott Edwards:

Hey, ladies and gentlemen, welcome to this week's show. We got another tremendous interview coming up for you. This is a long time friend, terrific comic, very successful road comic. And well, we should just jump into it. Ladies and gentlemen from Southern California. It's done freeze and Dawn, Dawn, it's so great to have you on the show.

Don Friesen:

Thank you, Scott. Long time.

Scott Edwards:

Yeah, well, I we have not talked recently. But actually, you're one of the acts that I've used for some special event bookings in the last 20 years, as opposed to the first 20 years of my comedy career. So we've stayed in better contact than most, but it's great to hear your voice and doing this podcast. I mean, it's been a whole lot of fun connecting with you and other peers from the comedy industry. And we have so much to talk about. To kick things off. I know that you're originally from Fresno, right? That is correct. Did you do any comedy in Fresno? It's not really a hub for entertainment.

Don Friesen:

No, I actually was not a comedian. When I lived there, I was just, I grew up there. And I did. There was a comedy club called the course of the Comedy Store, the Athenian Comedy Store. Yeah. In downtown, and I actually got a fake ID. So I could see comedy.

Scott Edwards:

See, most people are getting fake IDs to get booze, but you wanted to break into a comedy club. That's different. Yeah. Yeah. Well, then your first experience with entertainment had to be when you were at USC,

Don Friesen:

yes, I was a business major. And I was junior ish. And I was just, you know, I was just burnt out on business. I was I was selling commercial real estate at the time and going to school. And wow, you got to start out going. Yeah, you got started. Right. And, and I was just, I was kind of disillusioned by the whole thing. And then a subject for another podcast, but I was actually going through a bankruptcy as a business student, and I thought, well, maybe maybe this isn't my thing.

Scott Edwards:

The signs were up there God was giving.

Don Friesen:

Right. So I just I decided to stretch out. I had one more year of financial aid eligibility. And I had gone through the wringer with the creditors, and I just tried to do too much. And I was just, you know, stressed out. And I thought I'm gonna take an extra year bonus here and enjoy school, really have the student experience. I worry about being broke afterwards.

Scott Edwards:

Well, for our podcast listeners, USC is the University of Southern California. So this isn't some small college. It's one of the big ones on the West Coast.

Don Friesen:

Yeah, very expensive. And I, you know, I borrowed a lot. That's a whole other story, but just paid off my loans a few years ago. But that's sad. Yeah. So, so I was. So suddenly I had to make sure I didn't have to, you know, stick with the agenda. I had, like, all kinds of electives I could take. And I decided, Hey, I've always wanted to try improv. You know, it scares me. But it was available. Like I took an improv class and just immediately just fell in love with it, and started an improv troupe there. And that, that kind of going,

Scott Edwards:

Wow, now, we should explain to the audience that don't know you as well as I do. You're kind of a tall lanky guy. And then you took your hair a little bit taller, you've always had that kind of two or three inch straight up hairdo that made you a little bit unique, not not crazy in color or anything. But I knowing you and how physical you can be. I bet you really did well. In improv.

Don Friesen:

Yeah, improv was a blast. And I just loved it and scared the hell out of me. I was just I didn't, you know, I had stage fright, like, pretty bad throughout the years and was able to like over overcome it just through sheer repetition. But I found out a few years ago, that the truth that I started is still going USC and

Scott Edwards:

wow, that's certainly credible.

Don Friesen:

That's yeah, that's a great compliment to what I did I ever was.

Scott Edwards:

I wouldn't say that man, you've been very successful, very few comics have. Now What year was this, that you were a junior at USC,

Don Friesen:

I would say 1990.

Scott Edwards:

So, so you've had, you know, two or three decades as a professional road comic. And a lot of people could never survive that or make a living, and be as successful as you and you've had other successes that we're going to talk about. But the fact that you were nervous, which is important for people out in my audience to hear that everybody has a little frightened or in trepidation about getting on stage. And the only way to beat that is to keep getting on stage. And to start that improv troupe at USC, in the fact that it's still going today is quite a tribute to you.

Don Friesen:

Well, I'm very proud of that. I don't take responsibility for the continuity, because I thought when I left, it was over. I didn't, I wasn't the person who like, you know, continued to legacy or whatever. But somebody in the troop kept it going. Because at the time, I was the founder and director and I was kind of like the I was never the biggest talent in the group. But I would definitely the driving force.

Scott Edwards:

Yeah, the power behind it. The the movement. What's the name of that improv group?

Don Friesen:

It "comedic interruptus".

Scott Edwards:

Really? That's a great name. Yeah.

Don Friesen:

Which I didn't come up with either. But yeah, it was a great name. And they've they've had like, they've had famous alums, and several SNL alums, and that went through that improv definitely become much more famous than I ever than I ever was, you know, starting it out so well, but still, yeah, even sure I could, if I auditioned for them, I'm getting really good.

Scott Edwards:

I don't know about that. But I think that you still get the crown for being the guy that started and perpetuated here, the entertainment form on a campus that's business oriented. I mean, that's a very serious college. And to get something like that going was not only, I'm sure helpful to get you through your last year of school, but it's been helpful, apparently, for the last three decades to other students. Now, when would you? When did you come to work for me at laughs? Unlimited, I've had 1000 Comics come through my club. You and I are old friends, but I don't remember how it started.

Don Friesen:

Okay, so I went on the road in January of 95. And I want to say it was probably the first year at the latest the second year, so it was either 95 or 96 that we did we connected? I want to say it's probably 96, maybe late 96.

Scott Edwards:

Well, I know that it was it was a real advantage to me as a club Booker to have somebody of your quality. And people were here when they hear the set. By the way later in this show, we're going to showcase set you did for me from my 20th anniversary CD. And you made that because of the quality of entertainment you always brought to the club. But for the audience, let me just explain that Dawn is tremendously funny. Very clean, but it's high energy entertainment. I mean, you really give it all for the audience.

Don Friesen:

Yeah, it was. It was there was a lot of fun. I had a lot of really fun shows at your club. I specifically remember developing the airline pilot fit in the time that I was at your club.

Scott Edwards:

I remember that bit. It's very funny. That was one of the ones you worked on at the at the club. That's great to hear.

Unknown:

Yeah, I remember it was about two or three minutes long, and it was killing. And then I just wanted to do more with it. And I ended up like breaking it down and trying a bunch of different things and stretching it out. And it was like it kept sputtering in the middle and I just remember workshopping it if your club over a couple passes through well, and I spent like a year and a half on that bit. And it ended up it ended up though at the end being like six or seven minutes long and the longest version. So it was like it was a crazy crazy bit but very physical.

Scott Edwards:

Well I think it's great to point out that is even though laughs unlimited was in a room and we had some of the biggest names in entertainment come through. It was also like the university level in the in the career process. In other words, a lot of comics out of LA would never Try a new bit at the Comedy Store the improv because you never know who's in the audience, you could come to Sacramento and work on material. I mean, I remember Gary Shandling would actually take notes up on stage and try bits because he wanted to see if there was an audience for it. And then he would decide whether to work it up into something or not. So for you to take what is now a big chunk of your act and develop it at my club. I'll take a little pride in that. Thank you very much. And well, we did have good crowds. In fact, one of the things I wanted to ask you about is you came out with a tremendous DVD CD set called"Inexplicable". And ladies and gentlemen, it's still available on Don's website, Don freezin.com, I think you could probably find it, but your CD inexplicable, was recorded live in Sacramento, at the crest theatre, because I was there. And it came out really well. But I was curious, how did you choose being from Fresno originally where I'm sure you have a core audience and all your work in Southern California? How did you choose Sacramento to record your first CD?

Don Friesen:

Well, actually, you it was there were a couple things. One was? Well, first of all, you were you were one of the guys who, you know, really got behind me very early on. And you allowed me to come through and headline your club. least twice a year, but sometimes three times a year. And so I was able to build a following in Sacramento. That was my biggest following in the country at that early point in my career. Yay. Yeah. So I had good solid following. And then I had the really big boost from media. Not only did I go through and do all of your radio shows, and morning shows, and all that on a regular basis, so they all knew me, but specifically, Paul until

Scott Edwards:

Oh, by 92, Paul and Phil. Yeah.

Don Friesen:

They were big fans and big supporters. So I approached them. When I was considering taping a special and self producing. And they got on board. They were helping me promote it. I did, I did their their Christmas Special, which was a big blowout thing. I did that once or twice for them. And their fanbase knew me. And I don't think I could have ever filled that 900 seat theater without, you know, without the combination of their their BACnet. In fact, Paul did a little cameo opening. He wasn't on the DVD. But you know, he just introduced it. And so yeah, they were they were great. So that was fun. He brought out his old material.

Scott Edwards:

Yeah, he brought out his old sign for the blind, the Braille road signs, which he had, which he hadn't done in years, it was hilarious. So just to forget, yeah, just to catch the audience up. So there's an interview earlier in my podcast with Paul and Phil, but they were integral to the growth. Not only did I give them a start on stage before they became radio stars, and ended up on TV on the Discovery Channel and won two Emmys. So they've had a great career. And it all started as his stage act at laughs unlimited. But what I wanted to go back to was, and I've explained this before, that I used to bring comics that I really thought had a future in, like you said two, three, or even four times a year, because it built an audience within laughs Unlimited, where I could count on the entertainment level. The audience knew what they were going to get. They would tell their friends who I saw this guy earlier in the year, we got to go see him. And that perpetuated and built the audience. And I think it's great that on the CD and DVD inexplicable, you were able to take advantage of that audience growth and put it together with the marketing from Why 92 And like you said, pack out a 900 seat theater. And by the way, it was so fun to be involved in that and we were there that night. It was a high energy really fun. Comedy concert.

Don Friesen:

You electric. Yeah, Kermit Apio was the perfect opener to I mean, he was good. I was so set up by time I got on stage it was it was just really Yeah. Beautiful night.

Scott Edwards:

It was it was special to be a part of Kermit was also interviewed earlier on the podcast, folks, you should go check out his interview and sets. He's been featured many times but a great, clean comic that is always not only was he a good headliner for Laughs Unlimited but a great opening act for you because he's funny and totally clean. So it sets the audience up.

Don Friesen:

Yeah. And he, he was, I mean, he didn't need to open for me. It was just it was a friend saver at a friend price. And, you know, he knew he was completely selfless in terms of set it up the way you would want to be set up. So

Scott Edwards:

what now? You've been doing comedy now for three decades. Do you remember? What are your first jokes or bits? Or do you have you long trashed those?

Don Friesen:

Well, I've long trashed them, but I still remember. I'm kind of embarrassed to say them sometimes. Because they're, they're not great. But I think the earliest joke I remember was, I did a Jay Leno had this. The Cool Ranch flavored Doritos commercials, right? Yeah, I remember that. And he had a cool ranch flavored comedy competition that was going through colleges. Oh, I didn't know that. He was touring colleges throughout the country. And I was doing improv and stand up scared me even more than improv way more, because I didn't have a theme partner. So I did this. I did the first. My first common experience was at a bar in the student union, at USC in this competition. And one of my, one of the only original jokes I did, because I didn't even know at that time that you couldn't just do jokes that you had heard from other comics. I had no idea. And so I was trying to remember, you know, I put together a five minute set of things that I remember that were funding from comedy shows, I think, I mean, it's horrible, you know, looking back.

Scott Edwards:

But that's, you know, that's how a lot of people start.

Don Friesen:

Yeah. So my original joke that I remember was that he broke a rule here for new cool ran flavored condom. Football you want kids will make more.

Scott Edwards:

Cool, Red Cross. We'll make more Yeah. Oh, that's hilarious. Well, that's still original material.

Don Friesen:

Well, that was the only joke. But everything else was like, yeah, it was. And I did horrible. And I was so nervous. I couldn't breathe. And it was just coming back from that experience. And doing it a second time was probably the gut thing I've ever done. And

Scott Edwards:

well, it's interesting. It's interesting that you you explain that because so many people, especially back in those days, thought, oh, man, it's so easy to get rich and famous. You just get on stage and you tell a few jokes, and boom, you'll be discovered. And you know, and I've told I've told the story a dozen times, but it was hard work. You know, you had to really go after it every day, every night was a different audience. You had to be a writer, he had to be a performer. And I've tried to explain to the audience, you had to also be an actor, because what makes a comic, an actor is that every time he goes on stage to do a set, he has to act like it's the first time he just thought about it. In other words, it's almost like, it's like, oh, wow, I just thought of this, when really he's probably been doing it for months. Right. Right. Right. And that that's, that's where the acting is a moment. Exactly. And the I think it's interesting that you had that kind of what you felt like difficult start, and we should take it to your career to the next level. So ladies and gentlemen, get ready for this dawn freezin won the San Francisco comedy competition, one of the biggest in the country in 1999. And then came back with a different set and wanted again in 2005. And as far as I know, you're the only comic to win this prestigious comedy competition. Twice. Is that right? That is correct. Don, that's a huge feather in your cap.

Don Friesen:

Yeah, no, it's great. It's, these are fun things that throughout your career, you have a couple of benchmarks. I look back I think like all you know, whatever. But when I, when I think about it, like Yeah, that was that was great. That's something I'll always remember.

Scott Edwards:

Well, it really puts you on the map. I mean, for again, for the audience that may not know, for a number of years, the in San Francisco there was the San Francisco comedy competition and guys would work clubs all over Northern California, and get whittled down and whittled down to like the top 10 or 20. And then there was huge prizes. That was great press and we're not Not talking slackers, there were really great comics involved, many of which went on to fame and fortune. And to not only win that, which would be great just once, to be the only guy in history to win it twice. I mean, that's amazing Don and a real tribute to your performance and writing skills. That now you don't have the two trophies and the money still showcased in a piece of plastic somewhere.

Don Friesen:

money's been long gone. It's actually not really even a trophy. It's just something on the resume. It is great, because people still bring it up. And it's been too long ago. It was a law review something special to me. But people sometimes still, like throw that into my intro. Like, that's great, but it's, I think the expiration on that being part of my life stage intros Longson?

Scott Edwards:

Well, I'm gonna disagree with you don, as a producer. No, I'm not a comic producer. I've done stage shows, concerts and television and lots of radio, where from a production point of view, it's important to showcase what are special achievement. So whether it's acting, comedy, or even singers to mention an award, or a completion of something as important as the San Francisco comedy competition. I mean, quite frankly, done that last forever. You know that that's an accolade that you and only you can say now, let's let's treat the audience to remember some of the entertainers that were in the 99 or 2005. Competition.

Don Friesen:

Yeah. So that you probably wouldn't know most of them. But But James, because, you know, you know, my buddy again? Yep. Good. Yeah, yeah. came in. Remember me? Yep. He's a Seattle guy.

Scott Edwards:

Well, it's not on the tip of your tongue. But there was some good comics. Maybe we should take it from another reaction. I know previous winners were people like Robin Williams. I mean, it. There were some big Carvey Yeah, big names that have won that competition that we all know. Oh, did Ellen win that?

Don Friesen:

Yeah, I believe so. Oh, that's, that's interesting. I she worked for me as a feature as well, you know, she may have been a finalist. I don't know for sure he was, but I think you want for him?

Scott Edwards:

Well, the point was, I wanted to bring up all this stuff. Now. That's okay. It's been a long time. I'm sorry to bring it up. But it is so important for people in you to realize that to win that competition twice, with the legacy of people that have done it previously, like Carvey and Robin Williams, and Elon, whoever else. I mean, if I Googled it, you'd probably see a bunch of names, you know, but I still think it's worthy to mention and in you should not be shy about it, because that's quite an achievement. Now, maybe what we should do then is talk about something a little more recent. I know that in 2012, didn't you do a Showtime special?

Don Friesen:

I did. "Ask your Mom"?

Scott Edwards:

My mom wouldn't know. Yeah, so the title of the show was ask your mom.

Don Friesen:

"Ask your Mom". Yeah. Yes, it is.

Scott Edwards:

Oh, that's great. Yeah.

Don Friesen:

I'm very proud. I'm very proud of that. Yeah.

Scott Edwards:

Because great for Showtime concert. Yeah, for Showtime to get behind you. Again, they had to recognize the talent. And I know, I'm reiterating. And I apologize to you in the audience. But we're talking about a comic, you Don that had worked the road for decades. Every month you were out doing colleges and clubs and your own concerts. You it takes that kind of work and that kind of dedication to get to the point and also be funny in a good writer for somebody like Showtime to say, hey, we're willing to produce your and show your special. I mean, that's really great.

Don Friesen:

Well, thanks. Yeah, no, I was I was very excited. It's It's hard because if you don't, if you don't get, you know, the right management, if you're not, if you're not the flavor of the month, pretty early on in your career, it's hard to prove to them that, you know, that you should still get the big breaks, especially if there's really nothing sexy about my trajectory. I mean, I've just like, I've hit every rung Got a ladder and just kept kept going.

Scott Edwards:

But I think that that's impressive. And one of the reasons why I'm trying to bring up the point that this didn't come easily to you, you really earned it. I mean, yeah, we both know people in our business that got seen or got that big break and ended up being celebrities. I mean, you know, you trudge through and made a career, and there's a lot of people I've tried to explain to my audience. I can list a name of comics. Kevin Nealon, Dana Carvey, Jay Leno, Seinfeld, you know, you can go on and on that started at my club, and they're now famous and you say their name and people know him. But there are a lot of, there's not a lot, but there's a cherished few that like you made a great career. Never got famous, never got rich. But you've had a full life. You entertained 1000s if not millions of people. And you know, I'm thinking of like, Milt Abel. Steve Bruner. Right. Bruce Bohm. I mean, there's there's a lot of people that are really, really funny. Really have that gift for the art form of stand up in comedy. Right. And Don freezin is on that list.

Don Friesen:

Well, thank you. I shoot for National Treasure. So I came up a little joy. Well, maybe, or household name, or maybe like regional staples, I guess. It's so funny week, I get a sandwich named after me. I'll be happy.

Scott Edwards:

Well, you know what, I'll see if I can arrange that right away. It's so funny. You said national treasure because that's something you would never expect any comic to get. But I just interviewed Yakov Smirnoff, and I think it's coming up later on my podcast. But Yakov actually was named a National Treasure by President Ronald Reagan. And, and he was, you know, of course, he was thrilled inclination. Exactly. Well, he, you know, he did so much during the fall of the Russian only guard. When Reagan said that it really meant something. And when you bring it up is like, well, that's what I was shooting for. It is reachable. You just didn't try hard enough.

Don Friesen:

No. Maybe I gotta go to Russia.

Scott Edwards:

You You might end up being the country. Yeah. You'll be the top dog over there.

Don Friesen:

speak Russian.

Scott Edwards:

Oh, well, that's a really great to know that you had goals and that you've read met a lot of them. And there's still more ahead of you. In fact, I know that besides your work on stage for colleges and life stages, and your Showtime special, but you you've done a lot of work recently on radio.

Don Friesen:

Oh, like Sirius XM? Yeah. Is that what you're looking at? Yeah.

Scott Edwards:

Doesn't that count?

Don Friesen:

No, no, no, I just want to make sure. I understand. Well, it sounds like a lot of work, but they're just playing my recordings over and over. Which is nice for me because it pays well, and good, steady. Good, solid income. You know, help me help me buy a house, that's for sure.

Scott Edwards:

Well, to explain it to the audience. Don is so clean and so funny and so original. He is a featured act on the five o'clock funnies and that has been shown or heard and re heard hundreds of times through Sirius radio. And I think that, again, to be chosen to be one of those acts. I know you're not the only one but you're one that's consistently been on there is another tribute to your material.

Don Friesen:

Yeah, in fact, I would say "Inexplicable". And"Ask Your Mom" are the two that have played the most inexplicable is the is has made me more money on the radio than any other thing that I've ever recorded? Well, and that was still played, I still get like, you know, this is from 2006. Were 14 years ago and I and it's still amazing. Yeah, it just helps me make a living.

Scott Edwards:

Right. And just to track it. inexplicable was the concert you did live in Sacramento at the crest theater, right? So to have that have life still all these years later, is amazing. And it shows how comedy when done correctly, is evergreen. In other words, if you're not dirty, not too political, and you're not talking about current events, but you're talking about just life and in your case, we should have explained this earlier but your materials a lot about family and raising kids and being married and, and traveling because you were a professional, you traveled all over the country. Right? And these are all things that I think the audience, whether it's on a Showtime special or on a comedy club stage can relate to.

Don Friesen:

Right? My act is I've always thought of my act as a satire of my life. And my life is, you know, a lot about been about being married and raising kids. And, you know, so that's going to be reflected in my act, but it's just a satire of my life and how my interactions with modern daily life society, technology, love technology stuff in there. Yeah. Kind of like a sketch, sketch comedy. My My style is get comedy melted into stand up, because I do. Mostly doing characters in their interactions from my life, and switching back and forth between myself and whoever I'm, you know, the situation?

Scott Edwards:

Well, I think that's interesting, because you're taking what you learn doing improv back at USC when you were a junior in college. And you've mord morphed into a really successful professional stand up act. And I think it's great that you could grow and utilize your talents that way. Now, we've talked about the Showtime special in 2012. And in you're still on the radio and the five o'clock funnies. What do you been working on? Or what's coming up in the next year or so for you, Don? Is there any more comedy for you?

Don Friesen:

Well, yes, I, you people probably don't have a time attached to this to this podcast. But let's just say we're talking about the hopefully near the end of the COVID era, hopefully. And I was a year ago, I was getting ready to take my next our special and had the theater all picked out. And we were talking about deposit and running through the tech specs and everything is probably about a week away from putting the hard money down. And COVID hit and so it's throwing everything into flux, but I'm hoping audiences are able to assemble shortly.

Scott Edwards:

They're gonna be desperate to get out get back up. Yeah, they're gonna people are just so tired of being cooped up, they're going to explode. So we could think that maybe and hopefully before the end of 2021 You're going to have another live stage concert and you're going to record it for posterity and get it out and market it

Don Friesen:

yet, but now I was self producing in ahead of it was a big budget. So I have a little modestly I have quite a bit less of a budget to spend on it now.

Scott Edwards:

Whats' That title for something people can look for

Unknown:

it well yeah, very well may change the tentative title is lesson one.

Scott Edwards:

I'm sorry say that again.

Don Friesen:

The tentative title is "Lesson Learned" a lesson learned Okay,

Scott Edwards:

so podcast audience you want it you want a chance go to Don for reasons website you can still get his first CD and DVD "Inexplicable" which is so funny that five o'clock funnies is still share airing it. But coming up in the near future. We hope we'll keep an eye out for another show. What What city are you going to produce that in? Well, I

Don Friesen:

was set to tape it in Glendale at the theater, but I'm not sure now. It probably won't be in Los Angeles.

Scott Edwards:

Okay, so ladies and gentlemen, keep an eye out there's going to be a live performance you're not going to want to miss and if you do miss it. Hopefully by the end of the year, there'll be a new CD out called lesson learn by the very funny Don freezin Hey, Don, it's been so great to catch up and have this chat with you. You've been so successful you were one of laughs unlimited favorite headliners. We work together on some special events after my last year's got to work with you on your concert at the crest theatre. It's really been a great friendship. And thank you for doing this podcast.

Don Friesen:

You're welcome. By the way, I had no idea you had such a great radio voice. I would have never guessed. Wow.

Scott Edwards:

Well, I did some radio in my early days, but it's good to see it's still there. Well, ladies and gentlemen, that's been a great interview by Don freezin. But I'm sure you're curious. What's What do we keep bragging about? Let's hear some of his comedy. So coming up right now is a set that I used on my 20th anniversary CD that features what I think is one of the best in the business. So stay tuned for that. Don, thanks for doing this again and we'll talk Soon, ladies and gentlemen hear some great comedy material by Don freezin Hey, Thanks, Don. Sure, thank you

Don Friesen:

feel like an idiot you know, watching TV all these 1010 10 commercials like I don't get it. You know, every time they add more numbers they bring out John Lithgow to explain it dial 10 321 Okay 1010 32321113211 And then one and then the number it's just that simple. Take the sum of the first three digits divide by seven round to the nearest whole integer if that total is a 10 or 11 Double down let the dealer showing a face car. Telephones now we're doing I don't know what to do with these things my wife tries to call me she's like well, can you call me from your car? I cannot call you from my car. I cannot call you from afar i cannot call you from a tree I cannot call you after three. Like I'm talking to Ken I need a better calling plan just an idiot you know they've got books for me now these idiots guides you know, I got a new computer my friend said just get the complete Idiot's Guide to Windows. I was like okay, the Idiots Guide you know, the complete Idiot's Guide. Okay, fine. You know, I should have been insulted I was actually relieved that they had it. It is good so it's promising All right. Then I'm driving down there I start thinking well what if I get the Idiots Guide they still don't get it. I gotta take it back. That's embarrassing. Well, I thought I was an idiot. But apparently I've got a lot of work to do. One way ticket on the woods Express. You take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife all aboard look here to your right you'll see a man apologizing for Sam he didn't even do like a reflex. You know sometimes I'm alone in the room. It just pops out sorry. She's off in the kitchen for what just in general. Catch up with her. I turned into a seven year old my knees get weak.

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