"Best Of" Series- Larry Miller - Over 100 Movies & TV shows...there's a Reason! Show #240

Larry Miller, a celebrated figure in the comedy industry for over four decades, is renowned for his sharp wit and iconic performances that have captivated audiences worldwide. Reflecting on his standup comedy career, Miller expresses a nostalgic appreciation for his journey, beginning with his early days in New York and his rise to prominence in the 1980s alongside comedy legends like Jerry Seinfeld. His success in stand-up naturally transitioned into memorable film and television roles, with standout performances in Pretty Woman and Christopher Guest's ensemble comedies such as Waiting for Guffman and Best in Show, further solidifying his comedic legacy. Known for his classy and timeless humor, Miller's unique blend of observational comedy and self-deprecating wit has endeared him to audiences, making everyday experiences like skiing mishaps and youthful antics hilariously relatable.

(00:00:22) "Versatile Comedic Talent: Larry Miller's Career"

(00:12:35) "Comedic Quirks of Daily Living Unveiled"

(00:15:11) Teenage House Party Mishap

(00:18:41) "Parental Return: Chaos at House Party"

(00:25:56) "The Hilarious Journey of Learning to Ski"

(00:29:20) "From Skiing Mishaps to Chairlift Revelations"

Transcript

Announcer: 0:04

This is another episode of standup Comedy. Your host and emcee celebrating 40 plus years on the fringe of show business stories, interviews and comedy sets from the famous and not so famous. Here's your host and emcee, Scott Edwards.

R. Scott Edwards: 0:22

Hi and welcome to this week's podcast. Oh, I am so excited. I have such a great show for you today. One of my oldest friends in the business, one of the funniest guys I ever met and got a chance to work with. And if I could show you his picture, you go, oh, him. Because he's one of the most recognizable faces in media. Over the last several decades, he's had over 100 appearances on TV shows and movies. Ladies and gentlemen, very funny guy, Larry Miller. Now in this week's podcast, I'm going to break things up a little bit again. Normally I either do a three set format showcasing three different comics or I do an interview with a comedy set attached. This week, Larry is so funny. I'm just going to do one set of his. It's going to be about 30 minutes. There's some funny, funny material. Now, this was taped back in like 1984, so he was just getting his chops done. He had just come out from New York where he was considered one of the funniest men in the universe. That's right. He's part of the group with Jerry Seinfeld and Mark Schiff. He is hilarious. I know you're going to join him now just to give you a little bit of his pedigree. In the 1980s, not only was he a regular at Laughs Unlimited, but he was seen twice on the Tonight show and also the David letterman show. In 1990, he really got known for a famous scene in the movie Pretty Woman. He's called the suck up guy. And when they go in shopping, he is hilarious. If you saw the scene or next time you watch the movie, that'll be one of the standout moments of the whole project. In 2005, he hooked up with Christopher Guest and he was a regular in all of his movies, including Waiting for Guffman and Best of Show. Some of the funniest movies ever made. And speaking of funniest movies ever made, no one ever talks about it because Robert Downey Jr. Has had such a great career as Iron man and so many other great features. Still, when I think one of the best and funniest out there is a movie called Kiss Kiss Bang Bang, nobody ever talks about it. Nobody ever knows it. It's kind of a throwaway. I think it's Hilarious. If you get a chance, check it out. Kiss Kiss Bang Bang with Robert Downey Jr. And in the very beginning of the movie, you'll see Larry Miller in that. He went on to do a lot of television. You've seen him in just about every show over the last couple decades. In 2008 he was seen on a Monk show. He was also on Burn Notice. And then as recently as last year, you might have seen him on ncis. So Larry Miller is a very successful entertainer and we had the pleasure of working with him many, many times in the early 80s. He is not only one of the Laughs Unlimited regulars from those days, but again is one of my personal favorites and you're going to see why right now. So instead of our normal multi act show format for the podcast, we're going to have one set. It's going to be rather long, about 30 minutes, all Larry Miller. And if you don't think this guy is funny, well then send me a comment because I think he is one of the funniest men in the universe. So sit back and enjoy a great comedy set from Larry Miller.

Larry Miller: 3:54

Oh, hello, I'm back now. Well, what a place. Last I'm lending. As you can see, no expense has been spared to put this place together. You know that's real red paint. So. Yeah. Why? You ever spend like a whole day trying to call someone on the phone? The line's busy all day. You finally get through, no one's home.

R. Scott Edwards: 4:24

How do they do that?

Larry Miller: 4:27

They hang up and dive out the window. You ever wonder about that? You keep the phone by the front door, get the car started, honey, ever wonder about that? Phones live in their own world sometimes. Boy, sometimes you go to call someone, they just called you, but it hasn't rung yet. You know that one? You pick up the phone and they're just there. It's a little spooky for a second, isn't it? No dial tone, just hello, Larry keeps you off the phone for weeks. I love that new telephone commercial that's out now with the, with the people haven't spoken in years and they go, hello, Mary. Bill, it's been 30 years. Yeah, I just got paroled. Hello? Hello? Don't make me come over there. Mary again. See you gotta think about some of these phones are so. Hey, car phones are supposed to be the next big thing now. Does this matter to anybody? Do we need car phones? You know what worries me about them? If you think drinking and driving is dangerous, try breaking up with your girlfriend in traffic. What do you mean? I'm selfish. You don't want to be available to everyone all the time, do you? It's gonna be embarrassing sometimes. Mary, I told you never to call me at this intersection. As if women don't get honked at enough on the highway, these jerks will be able to call over a couple of lanes now. Hi. How you doing? I see you from Illinois, land of Lincoln. I'm over here in the Pinto. Hello. Hello. Besides, you know the really obnoxious people are going to have answering machines in the car. Look, I know you're there. I'm right behind you. Do you understand this now? Sometimes the phone rings when you're on the toilet. Here's where women are different from men. Woman's on the toilet and the phone rings. There's no panic. She will calmly stand up, pick up her pants, go answer the phone. I will bet you there's not a guy here tonight. Yes, and I think you know where I'm going with this. Never pick those pants up. Just stand up and do that Frankenstein walk. Any ideas on this one, fellas? Boy, never. Why? We all do it. We don't talk about it. It's not in the handbook. Do that stumpy duck walk into the living room. Why? So you can stand there like an imbecile with the phone? Oh, hi, Mom. Nothing. Oh, hi, dad. Your father's there with his pants down. Oh, hi, son. You know, that's how traditions start. Well, men. See, men really are different from women, though, in the good ways. There are many interesting things. I swear, women appreciate things that men don't understand. I got. I went shopping for my girlfriend. We come back with, like, some soap. She asked me to pick up some stuff, so I got some toilet paper. She picks up the toilet paper. She goes, not green. I said, honey, it's not new drapes. She said, you're not green. And I said, well, what do you want? So I brought her a. You know, I realized I had never considered the color. You know, to me, the only thing about. I think, to most men, the only important thing about toilet paper is that it's there when you need it. No one likes that surprise, man or woman. You turn to your left and, oh, no, I never check. Oh, no, that spool just grins back at you. Who's sorry now? Things are different now. Kids eat all sorts of junky food. Is anybody suspicious about this whole NutraSweet thing? By the way, the new sweetener, you know, supposed to be good for you. It's just that, you know, in a couple of years. There's going to be a. Well, there is one thing. You grow another head. Thanks a lot. Don't look at me. You wanted to lose weight. I said don't look at me. See, they don't even get along. I'm looking forward to next week, though. Boy, after that Thanksgiving again back home, you know what a problem is? You go out, you have a good meal with your family. Then you go out with the old hometown buddies, the guys you grew up with, have a few drinks. 30 could happen now because you're staying with your parents for the holiday. Now you have to sneak back in the middle of the night without waking them up. It's like being 16 again. Because you know, at 4 in the morning you always get that drunk. Ego too. On the sidewalk, staring at the house. That. I can handle this. Okay, here we go. Okay, here's one. Here's two. Garbage can. Shh. Why do we shush inanimate objects? By the ways anybody ever figure this out? Should be very quiet. Step on the dog. Stepped on his eyes. Everything gets so loud now. You cross the living room floor, the minefield, it's pitch black. Oh, Jesus. You know that feeling when you're already in the middle of the floor? It's too late to go back. I'm trapped. They'll find me in the morning. The only people who never have to worry about creaky floors are people like Linda Blair, Damien Carey. Because you know, they can do that floating devil's walk that. And as a rule, these people don't get that upset when their parents yell at them. Anyway, they're possessed, you know. Boy, Mom's food. So that's why I like going home. Mom's food. See, that's something else. See? You go to your own refrigerator at 4 in the morning. What's there? An onion. It's been there about a year. It's growing other onions. That's pretty. When it happens, huh? Men's refrigerators are always worse. Any woman knows this. You go to a man's refrigerator, there's a six pack. There's always a bottle of hot sauce. No one knows why. Okay. On the door, some mayonnaise from the 60s. You know, men never throw things out. Your girlfriend will pick up that jar. Why do you still have this? It's blue. Well, it was there when I moved. A couple of more years. It'll change back. Honey, you know, they get dirty too. You can reach into a man's refrigerator, something goes.

R. Scott Edwards: 13:21

See?

Larry Miller: 13:21

But Mom's food, that's something else. Because mom knows how to cook. All mothers have a supernatural property with food. Anyway, my mother could repeat the name of the food as if just that would make you hungry. She'd say, have some steak. Not a one or any. It's steak. Bring it on. You ever get this one? Eat the lima beans. I don't like lima beans. Well, I made them a different way. How different are they gonna. Are they peanuts? Now, mom, there's gotta be a big difference. I don't like. My mother could act like a lawyer, too. She could break the food down into parts like you're being cross examined on the witness committee. She'd say, you didn't eat the beef stew. I don't like beef stew. Well, you like meat, don't you? Yes. You enjoy potatoes. Isn't that true? Well, there's so many different kinds. I just. Well, then you like beef stew. Yes. Yes, it's true. Stop badgering me. Very dramatic for childhood, wouldn't you say? Even for this act. But Mom's food. That's the difference. You open Mom's refrigerator four in the morning and that light comes pouring out like a ballet. Is there anything prettier than taking tinfoil off a bowl late at night? What's it gonna be? Could be chicken. Could be stuffing. Whatever it is, it's what you want. That much, you know. Of course, you got the pickle jars falling, pots and pans hitting the floor. You're in the refrigerator now. You don't even hear dad come in. The kitchen light comes on, there's dad. Well, everybody's father does that late at night, don't they? Old dad scratching and picking down there. Yeah, everybody's father does that. It's a disgusting thing to watch it for in the morning, I'll tell you that. I know that. I don't need that. Do you need that? I don't need that. Geez, with the jockey shorts with no elastic left. Jeez, it's the rudest thing in America. I'll be honest with you. Hey, dad, please. Cause I'm going to throw up. I promise. Gee whiz, it's a macabre experience. I'll be honest with you. It's a male thing. I admit that. As soon as men get married, they get that ring on. They're picking and pulling. I don't know why. Maybe women know why. I don't know why. That's your childhood, dad squinting and that one, if you can get that. That's dad. Well, it's still great to go home. I found a toy. I Used to play with. Last time I was home. Boy. It's gonna show you how your outlook changes. I used to love it as a kid. It's garbage. As an adult, you. You change as you get older. It was. It's called Electric Football. It was a rectangular vibrating board. You remember they had. The men had the plastic flaps on the bottom of their feet. You turn the game on, they all. Oh, that was the problem. They went all over the board. You couldn't score with this piece of junk. Take an hour to line up. One play, you turn it on. Was this fun? I think it was fun. They had a kicker. You click the foot back. Little Q tip. Football. You ever score with this? Come on. Right in your mother's eyes. There was a million to one shot. All the men cleared along the border. They were all up there. So you get all excited, right? You think you're going to score. Guaranteed the guy with the ball is like. Or else he gets locked in that permanent do si do with another guy that. That Alaman left for the rest of his life. You hate to see that happen. I don't care where you're from. So that's your youth there. See? See if this scene sounds familiar. Sixteen years old, Parents go away for the weekend, leave you at the house. Now, as they're pulling away from the curb, your father says, I'll take good care of the house. All right? You got everything you need? Oh, yes. Then the big one. No parties. No, it's parties. Why? Why would you have a party in a big empty house? Where's the fun? There, of course, they pull away. You don't have just a party. You call up anyone you've ever heard of, you pick up that phone. I got a house. I was surprised. You ever have your parents come back early? Hey, there's the rub. Come back a few days early. Party's still going on there. 80 people in the house, naked, screaming at the top of their lungs. Music is blaring. And through it all, you can still hear the key turn and the door. Well, you got those ears out, boy. That's your butt on the line, right? You're upstairs. You hear that? You go, mother of God. Because it's all over. I mean, that's it. Your life is unraveling, and it's about to happen. I will never forget this as long as I live. I was in the kitchen in my underwear. Just heard that key turn. You just go. Because it's all over. I remember by the first thing I saw, I swear I looked into the Den. I saw my girlfriend. She was in her underwear. She's sitting just on the couch. And I saw her. I could see her face looking at the front door. And I heard my father's voice go. I heard that. I saw her sitting there looking at him. I heard his voice go, who am I? Who are you? They walk in one. One of my bizarre scenes. One of my friends is making out with my mother's dress mold in the living room. You know, I still haven't figured that one out. Guys are playing skeet shoot with the china pole. Ten friends sitting around the phone making calls to Denmark. Now, you have one choice, and you know it. You have to come barreling into the living room, pretend nothing's wrong. We might as well give it a shot. Yeah, you give it a try. You go in there. Dad. What a surprise. Nah, it's a bad scene. There were nine people in their bed. Nine. There's no reason for that. Not then, not now. There's just no reason for it. Gee. Months later, my father was still finding devices with. The hell is that? Gee. Marion, come in here a minute, would you, please? They grounded me, boy. In fact, this is my first night out. But it's been fun. You've been great here tonight. Good end to a good week. Thanks for coming out. Thank you, boy. Thanks. Hi. Wow. Well, see if this scene sounds familiar. You're 16. No. No, that's no good. Well, you're awfully nice, boy. I like it here. Old Sack. Is that the best name we could come up with, by the way? That's. It's not a pretty name, is it? Where are you from? Just Northern California somewhere. But what's the name? It's old. Just. No, what's. It's Old Sack. What? The Old Sack. I don't know how he named it either. Geez. I wasn't in there. They didn't ask me. So what are you. What's going around here? Winter coming up. Is this skiing territory? Yeah, apparently so. I'm not on much of a. No water skiing. No, I'm talking about snow skiing. Both kinds. No, snow skiing is much more dangerous. There are very few trees you can hit on. A lake, maybe on Venus. The Sacramento. The Sacramento River. A pretty river, isn't it? Yeah, just like old Virginia, you know. That's fine. Well, I went. You could kill yourself skiing, you know. I mean, to me, there's no reason to ever go skiing because I went, you know, they have. I had to rent skis. They have three beautiful pairs of skis in the Window. Your skis come from the cellar. It's one of those. Your skis. Quick, light a match. They hate fire. I'm going the old wooden skis, the ones they lash up your leg, you know. Last person to use mine was Heidi. I'm going skiing. You know, I was going to go on what they call the bunny slope. You skiers know, this is the elementary slope. It's like a driveway. I'm about to go on the easy slope. One of my friends stops me. He says, well, look, Larry, don't waste your time on the bunny slope. Come with me. Does this sound familiar to anybody here? All right, the old come with me. All right, but you look at the guys. He's got the matching banana colored skis and boots. You know, he's got the skin tight. You know, when the pants are so tight you can tell the guy's religion. That's it. Come on. I told you, you gotta think about some of these, you know, Stay with me. That's. That's one of those delay jokes on the way home. The guy's good. He takes me on a regular hill there, you know, Geez, I should have been suspicious because, you know, they have the names, the Bluebird Apple Valley. Ours was the Hindenburg. But you don't notice these things at the time. It takes you 11 tries to get on the chair, you know, oh, oh, oh, oh, gee, that's another tremendous pain. You finally whoop, you get on the chair there. As we're going up, I begin to notice the debris of other skiers. Should his leg be bent like that? See people in these cartoon positions with, like poles through their heads. That's no good. I don't like that. That's no good, is it? You know, we're going up, there's these chairs go up there. A plane went by and I could see the movie again. Didn't bother me. You know, I'm. Gee, I'm with my friend. So he says to me, about halfway up, he says, you know, here's the secret of skiing. You're going too fast, you want to slow down, you want to stop, you put your knees together and you push. Okay, skis. This is called Snowplow. All right? Now, I think you do this and stop on a dime, all right? No, I think you. That's it. That's the secret. Like, I'm one of a dozen people to know it. Thanks. I'm glad we spoke. We get to the top of the hill and I know the secret. Just. They have the raised mound of snow you gotta lift both skis up as you. So, of course, I catch one tip on the front of the mound there. Welcome to the wishbone game. All right, I'm going, Bobby. Poppy. Poppy. I rolled back halfway. Had it right up on somebody's ankle, you know. Believe me, I appreciate this. I fell. What would you do? Get back up to the top. My buddy's at the edge of the slope, you know, goggles down. I'm like, don't leave me here. He shouts back, well, you'll be okay. You know, the secret just takes off now. I'm really. I'm not afraid at all because I'm so. Beautiful day. I'm going to ski. I know the secret. Yeah, exactly. So I. So I just pet over to the side for a little look down the slope. Yeah. Clouds are moving below you. All right, off on the side, there's a billy goat going. He's calling his friends, Frankie, Al, the guy has rented skis. Didn't bother me. I know the secret. So all you have to do to ski, you lean forward. You're at the edge. You just. And you're skiing. Of course, in about three seconds, you're going Mach 1. Trees are a blurry. Just go shooting past these two guys. I know that's something you don't see every day. He's very good. I think he's crying now. I'm going down this hill just like. But that's on the outside. On the inside, I'm thinking, well, this is my first time skiing. I'm going too fast. Yeah. No, yeah, I. Yeah. No, I. I should. No, yeah, I. I should slow down. I should. What's the word? Stop. How can I affect this change? Well, you know, it's silly of me, really. In all the excitement, I nearly forgot. Yes. As if people began whispering it from a darkened room. I thought to myself, I'll use. Suddenly, there were more of them. The advice still seemed sound. Remember, again, this is all inside the outside. I'm all right, but with presence of mind. With every ounce I have, I hit this snowplow. Absolutely nothing happens. In fact, you go a lot faster when you do this. The reason for that is the snowplow has the effect of clearing away the bodies of other skiers who have been killed trying to get down the hill before you. Now I panic. Now I feel like the guy in the beginning of Wide World of Sports. I will never laugh at him again. I respect him. Now. Now I panic. I do what all skiers do, which is anybody. No, more specifically you. Thank you. You sit. You sit. You go for a thousand yards on your wallet. It's true. They can plant corn in back of you. Now, of course, as you go, you leave a very neat trail of skis, poles, boots, clothes. Finally go into a tree. Now you get up, groggy, the equipment's all behind me. The only one who would help me out. You see him all over the slopes. Five year old kid. Oh, you could strangle these kids. They are so annoying. Expert skiers. Parents start him skiing when he's a fetus. They get him little ones and tiny goggles, as you could well imagine. Guy's good.

R. Scott Edwards: 32:19

He.

Larry Miller: 32:19

He gathers up all my stuff, you know, Shoots down one side, scoops up a glove with the pole, you know, I can. Goes across behind the back, gets the goggles, you know, gathers up all my stuff, goes over to where I am and pulls one of these. Are you okay? Now, here's what's happening. I'm making it down this hill every thousand yards. Why? I get the equipment on, start ski, can't stop, back down on the wallet, leave my equipment in a trail. Gotta wait for the kid to come back. You ever start going backwards by mistake, There's a nice surprise facing up the hill as you put the skis back on. You don't realize till it's too late. Oh, Christ. Backwards down the hill now, past those same two guys. Now there's another thing you don't see a lot. I'm telling you, he's got talent. Pass. All my friends. I didn't even realize there's all been a joke on me, you know? That morning my friends had decided, look, Larry's never been skiing. Take him up a big hill. But it'll be funny. He'll get hurt real bad. This is their conversation, waiting for me to appear. It's like, hey, look, he's been gone a long time. We don't want him to. Well, I was just thinking. Did you hear that? No, it wasn't human. And in the distance you hear, come up with a quest on one ski with the poles flying right into space with the kid right behind me. And those two guys are back again. Now he's giving lessons. Would you look at him? My friends are all yelling, sit down, Larry, sit down. This much I already know. Back down on the wallet. By the way, after a full week of skiing like this, I actually developed a shelf in my right cheek from the wallet. You know, that's not so bad in the shower. I can hold the soap now, but you might as well learn something. Tonight, and it might as well be now. I finally figured this out. The real secret of skiing. All right, next time you go, when you get on the chairs, you're going up to the top. Don't get off. It's a beautiful ride, lovely day. Your legs are dangling. You go around up top, you get to the bottom. The attendant hands you another beer. Thank you very much. You go back up again. That's the secret of scheme. Thank you. A very special night. Thank you. Thanks for being here.

R. Scott Edwards: 35:41

Well, was I right or was I right? That was Larry Miller, ladies and gentlemen. I'm sure you enjoyed that comedy set from back in the early 80s. This guy is, as everybody agrees, one of the funniest men in the universe and we hope you enjoyed it. Not only was he a regular at Laughs Unlimited back in the day, but we had a chance to hang out together away from the club. We spent some time together in la, went out a couple nights, going to other clubs, and both on stage and off stage, Larry Miller is one of the classiest and funniest people in the business. Well, again, we hope you enjoyed this unique episode of our podcast. We appreciate you listening. Moving forward, we have some more interviews and great standup comedy. We hope you're enjoying this series, so continue to listen, share and subscribe to our podcast. Thanks for being a part of our show this week. Bye.

Announcer: 36:37

We hope you enjoyed this episode of Stand Up Comedy. Your host and mc. For information on the show merchandise and our sponsors, or to send comments to Scott, visit our website at www.standupyourhostnmc.com. look for more episodes soon and enjoy the world of standup comedy. Visit a comedy showroom near.